


iAsk Why Not

by ButterflyRae



Category: iCarly
Genre: Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-01-27
Updated: 2009-02-01
Packaged: 2013-07-30 06:32:47
Rating: K+
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,521
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4823397/1/
Author URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1376976/ButterflyRae
Summary: No, despite my mother’s insistence that it’s bird flu, I’m not actually sick. Unless you consider it sick for a 15-year-old boy to have never had a kiss. Apparently, many people do. Seddie





	1. Why Not Her?

**iAsk Why Not

* * *

**_Author's Note_: I've just recently gotten into iCarly and this is my first story in the fandom. It will be a 3-shot and the first chapter shall be from Freddie's perspective. Although iKiss has already been written about time and time again, I thought that there were a few unanswered questions and wanted to try my hand at it . . . Read & Review!

* * *

1. Why Not Her?

It's the second day that I've stayed home from school. I'm sitting in my room eating chicken soup and hoping that people will forget about the reason that I'm staying home. No, despite my mother's insistence that it's bird flu, I'm not actually sick. Unless you consider it sick for a 15-year-old boy to have never had a kiss. Apparently, many people do.

Just as I finish the last of my soup, someone knocks on my bedroom door. Even before she enters I know that it's Carly. My mother has never believed in knocking and I don't think that Sam does either. Not that Sam would be coming to see me.

Carly is wearing a surgical mask (apparently bird flu is contagious) and is carrying a pile of papers. My homework.

"How are you doing?" she asks, removing the mask after checking that the door is closed.

"I'm holding up," I say, giving her what I know is a weak smile. "Thanks for bringing my homework."

"No problem," she says, and I swear I see pity in her eyes. If she were anyone else, I think that it might make me angry.

"So . . ." she says, hesitantly, ". . . think that you're up to coming to iCarly rehearsal today?"

"Sorry," I tell her, "but I don't think so."

"Oh," she says, looking sad.

"Hey," I say, feeling guilty, "even if I were up for it, I don't think that my mother would let me out of the house."

Not to mention that the girl who just ruined my life will be there. The girl who _hasn't_ come check on me after school.

"That's true," Carly smiles slightly. And this time I _know_ that's a look of pity.

There is an awkward silence between us where neither of us really knows what to say. After what seems like forever Carly finally breaks it.

"Um, Freddie?" she asks softly.

"Yeah?" I say.

"Can I ask you a personal question?"

"I guess," I tell her, looking away.

"I . . . um . . ." Carly hesitates, "I know that you never actually kissed Valerie aside from that time in school . . ."

Of course she knows it. By now the population of the US and a good number of folks in Europe and Asia probably know it.

". . . But . . . um," she continues, "why not?"

It's a valid question and one that I've been asking myself all week. It's not like I never had the opportunity to . . . Even though she was just using me and pretending that she liked me, Valerie believed in method acting.

"I don't know," I say honestly, not meeting Carly's eyes. "I guess part of me always sensed that something was off."

"Oh," she says, looking puzzled.

"That, and well, I guess I wanted my first time to be with someone special," I continue.

This time I do meet her eyes and she gives me a sad look.

"Freddie," she says gently, "I'm really sorry but I just can't be that person."

"I know," I half-heartedly laugh, looking away again.

"Freddie," she says, sounding pained and very hesitant, "if you just want to get it over with I guess I would be willing to try it once . . . But you'd have to know that it would only be because I want you to be okay."

It's a tempting offer, but one that I know I can't take. I know, right? Who would have thought I'd be passing up a chance to kiss Carly Shay?

"I appreciate the concern, Carly," I tell her, "but I also don't want the first time to be a pity kiss."

And it would be with her now. And I would feel bad about it for the rest of my life.

"Okay," she says. "Well then I guess I'll see you later?"

"Yeah," I say.

And as she leaves I hear my mother yelling at her for not wearing the surgical mask. Is it any wonder that I've never been kissed?


	2. Why Not Him?

**iAsk Why Not

* * *

**_Author's Note 1:_ Thanks to everyone who has reviewed. :-) It's nice to know that Carly and Freddie seemed in character since this is my first foray into the fandom. All the characters on the show are great and I hope that I can do them justice. (Sadly, I know that I've failed to give Spencer any really good lines in this.) Read & Review!

* * *

2. Why Not Him?

When I get back to the loft, Sam and Spencer are there waiting for me.

"How's Freddie doing?" Spencer asks. Sam just looks away.

Since the web show, she and I haven't really talked about the matter. Although I think she and Freddie need to talk, I've decided not to push her on this one . . . At least not quite yet. This is something I hope that she'll realize herself.

"Same as before," I tell Spencer. "But Mrs. Benson seems to be getting worse. She's convinced that Freddie's got bird flu."

"Yeah, well, the guy _does_ seem to attract pigeons," Sam smirks.

I shoot her an angry look and she drops it.

"I still can't believe that he's never been kissed," says Spencer, clearly oblivious to the fact that this is not something I want to get into with Sam now. He opens the refrigerator as he talks and pulls out the ingredients for a sandwich.

"I can," Sam scoffs, "who would want to . . ."

Her voice trails off as she catches me looking at her angrily again. Clearly she wants to avoid a serious conversation about this as well.

"I don't know," says Spencer, beginning to assemble his sandwich. "Freddie's gotten to be a good looking kid."

"If by kid, you mean goat, then yeah, he's real attract—. . ." Sam starts but trails off once again after meeting my eye.

Kid. I don't know why, but when we were younger, I always thought of Freddie as a kid as well. Maybe this is a horrible way to think about one of your best friends, but for the longest time, I just didn't view of him as a peer or an equal. Maybe it was the fact that he didn't hit puberty until later than we did, but it probably had more to do with the fact that he didn't _act_ like my equal. In fact, up until recently he constantly fawned over me.

"I think I'm to go set up for practice since Freddweird isn't here," Sam says, grabbing the sandwich out of Spencer's hands and pushing the button for the elevator. "See you in a sec, Carls?"

Spencer just lets her take it almost as if he was expecting it. Knowing Sam, he probably was. He calmly pulls out two more pieces of bread starts assembling another sandwich as I nod in acknowledgment at Sam.

"Seriously, Carly, I know you don't want to date Freddie," Spencer asks me, spreading mayonnaise on his bread, "but why not?"

"Are you crazy!" Sam yells, just as the elevator door closes on her. And although the door muffles her voice a bit I can still hear her ranting and raving about what a dork Freddie is.

Ironically, it's actually Sam that's made Freddie into a more realistic possibility. Although, in some ways, Freddie still doesn't act like my equal, lately he's been acting like hers. He hasn't been taking her pranks lying down and has been giving as good as he gets. Somehow all of her put downs have raised him up and made him seem like a stronger person. It _has_ made me look at him differently. However, the same things that have made me look at Freddie differently are also the answer to the question I've just been asked. Why not Freddie?

"That's why not," I say inclining my head toward the elevator.

"Because you don't think that Sam likes him?" Spencer asks.

"No," I smile very slightly, "because I think that she might."

I've suspected as much ever since she proudly showed me an iCarly extra that she made of herself throwing him on a bean bag chair and tickling him. This wouldn't have seemed _that_ abnormal before Freddie hit puberty, but now it was just . . . well . . . telling.

"Ooooh," says Spencer, a look of comprehension coming over his face. "That has crossed my mind before."

"Of course," I say, "I can't be sure of it, and if she does like him, I don't think she's totally realized it, but still . . ."

But still I could never even think of dating Freddie if there was even the slightest chance that I was on to something. As bad as things had gone when we both liked Shane, I think that dating Freddie would be ten times as bad . . . I just have this feeling that it would hurt her more . . . And that she'd be too freaked by her own reaction to say anything about it . . .

"Carls!" Sam shouts from upstairs. "What's taking you so long?!"

"Coming!" I shout and smile at Spencer as I make my way up stairs.

* * *

_Author's Note 2:_ The impetus for this chapter was not actually questions about why Carly doesn't date Freddie (although I think that's a very interesting question to ask, since although I prefer Seddie, I'll admit that Season 2 Freddie seems like a much more viable romantic possibility for her than he did in Season 1). But what I was _really_ puzzled by was that Carly didn't yell at Sam about Freddie any time in the week before iCarly. After all, he missed two rehearsals suggesting that Carly had plenty of opportunity. If nothing else, this is meant to show how I think the Carly / Sam dynamic might have worked for the week in between the web shows and what Carly might have been thinking throughout that week.


	3. Why Not?

**iAsk Why Not

* * *

**_Author's Note 1:_ Personally, I think that this chapter is too long. The part that I was initially interested in writing was the part that we didn't see on TV---Freddie watching iCarly before Sam comes to see him. Part of me actually thought of stopping there because the part beyond that has been done to death and I felt like I _had_ to describe all of it if I did it at all. However, there _were_ a few things I wanted to get at and thought that I couldn't really illustrate without getting into the thick of the episode. So without further ado . . . Read & Review.

* * *

3. Why Not?

Five minutes to iCarly, and for the first time, I'm not there in the studio. I'm sitting on the fire escape of my apartment, thinking about what happened last show.

Nonetheless, my laptop is with me. Fortunately, we've got a good WiFi signal and I can be on the internet out here. As upset as I am, I wouldn't miss iCarly for the world. Carly is a good friend and even if I'm not up to being there, I still want to support her.

Then there's the other half of iCarly. The half that _hasn't_ come to check on me after school or apologized in any way. In fact, it's the longest that Sam and I haven't spoken since we started doing iCarly together. Sure, she gives me a lot of grief, but I've always assumed that she cared about me. Now I'm starting to question that. The thought makes me upset . . . Probably more than it should.

Part of me is hurt, part of me is angry, and a very small part of me stupidly wants to see her. Can she really go on with the show as if nothing happened?

I turn on my computer and involuntarily count down in my head. In 5, 4, 3, 2 . . .

"I'm Sam," she says, popping onto my screen. "And I'm Carly," Carly says.

They start their opening monologue and the anger inside me starts to rise. How can she be so okay after what she's done?! She really doesn't give a damn.

But suddenly, she stops it. Stops the upcoming meatball war and faces the camera. And suddenly she's saying them. The things that I wanted her to say to me and she's saying them straight into the camera. That she was wrong; that telling the world I had never kissed anyone was a mistake.

And even more surprising is that she's angry. And she's yelling at our viewers about how they've been treating me like I wish that I could have done my self.

Then she does something really brave. She lies and tells people that she's never kissed anyone either. Even after seeing what happened to me, she takes it all on herself . . .

I get a lump in my throat as I look at it. I don't really know why. It's not like she's doing something above and beyond the call. She was the one who put me in this spot in the first place. But still . . .

And then all the anger is gone. I'm happy and sad all at once and I don't even know what to think anymore.

Carly stops the show and a man with shrimp up his nose appears on screen. I close my computer and put on some music. I listen to a few tracks and am trying to figure out what to make of all this when I hear a knock at the door.

It's her. Sam. Knocking. It's the first time that I've seen her in a week. I give her a small smile and wave her in.

"What's up?" she asks, softly.

"Nothing," I say.

I get up to turn off the music and she offers me a meatball from her pockets.

It's odd and a little bit puzzling. When I decline it she throws it off the fire escape. Sam Puckett is an odd girl.

"That was really brave . . . What you said," I admit.

"You heard?" she asks.

"You didn't think I'd miss iCarly," I smile at her.

She smiles back and then apologizes to me.

"I'm sorry," she says, "about telling people you never kissed anyone."

I give her a look of acknowledgement. I'm sorry about that one too but I know that I've kind of forgiven her now.

"And I about putting blue cheese dressing in your shampoo bottle . . ."

I can't help smiling slightly as I remember that.

"And about sending your cellphone to Cambodia . . ."

And I'm actually laughing at this point although that _wasn't_ funny at the time.

"Everything, okay?"

"So this means that you're not going to mess with me anymore?" I say skeptically. Somehow I have a hard time believing that. But somehow I'm not sure I want her to stop. How messed up is that?

"No, I'm still going to mess with you," she says. "I'm just going to apologize every few years so that I can start fresh again."

I realize that I've missed her this week.

"Good," I say.

"Good?" she questions surprised.

"Yeah," I say. "I'd be too weird if you didn't make my life miserable all the time."

Our relationship is totally different than my relationship with Carly but I realize that she does play a huge role in my life . . . And in her own way, she's special to me too.

"But, you know, maybe you could pull back just a little bit?" I ask.

"I don't think so," she says quickly.

"Yeah, I didn't either."

"It's so dumb," she says, and I give her a puzzled look.

"What do you mean?"

"You know, how people get all freaked out over their first kiss. It's stupid," she rolls her eyes.

And I'm confused. "So you weren't lying," I say. "You really never kissed anyone."

It's hard to believe. Sam is not a bad looking girl.

"Nope," she say, and I don't know what to think.

"Sometimes I just wish I could get it out of the way."

"Yeah, I know, me too," I say.

"Right?" she says. "You know, just so I can stop worrying about it."

"Yeah," I agree.

And then something strange pops into my mind. Here's this girl. This important person in my life telling me that she wants to be kissed. She doesn't pity me and she's not pretending to like me. And I think to myself, why not? Then I think, because she would kill me if I tried it and I laugh.

"What?" she asks.

"Nothing, it's—"

"Tell, me," she demands. For some reason she really wants to know.

"No, it's dumb," I shrug it off.

"Say it!" she says impatiently.

"Okay," I say hesitantly, "I was just going to say—"

"That we should kiss?" she interrupts.

And I'm taken aback. Not because it wasn't what I was going to say. It was. I'm more surprised by the tone that she said it in. It doesn't sound totally rejecting of the idea. Still, I hope that she doesn't break my arm for thinking it.

"You're going to break my arm now, right?" I say nervously. For some reason I'm finding it hard to breathe and it's not because she looks like she's going to break my arm. Maybe it's because _she doesn't_.

"No," she says calmly.

And once again I consider kissing her, and I think to myself, why not?

"Well, should we?" I ask nervously, expecting her to shoot me down at any moment. "Just so both of us can get it over with?"

"Hmm," she says. "Just to get it over with?"

"Just to get it over with," I confirm.

"And you swear we go right back to hating each other as soon as it's over?"

"Oh, totally," I agree quickly. "And we never tell _anyone_?"

"Never," she says, almost desperately.

We look at each other and I think, is this a good idea?

"Well, lean," she commands.

Nervously, I consider it. Then I look at her again and think that she _is_ objectively attractive. The question, why not, comes up yet again.

And suddenly I decide to do it. I lean in and I'm kissing her. Very softly, but also with some passion.

It's quick. I feel her kissing back and then I pull back, not wanting to make it last longer than she wants.

Huh, I think to myself, that's kissing. I enjoyed it and that it was with her and I don't know what to make of that.

Carly had described her first kiss as "just an ordinary little kiss." I don't know what an ordinary little kiss feels like, but I know that I wouldn't use that term to describe what we had done.

"Well, that was, um . . ."

"Nice?" she says stiffly.

"Yeah, nice, uh . . ." But that doesn't quite fit what it was either.

"Good work?" she says awkwardly.

"Thank you, you to," I agree quickly.

She turns to leave without saying anything and it's awkward. A funny thought pops into my head.

"Hey," I say, starting to smile. She turns around and gives me a look as if to say, what?

"I hate you," I smirk, playfully. She laughs a little bit.

"Hate you too," she says, and walks away and I watch her go.

Neither of us mean it, but that's not really a change. Neither of us meant it _before_ we kissed.

Until I said it, Sam had looked extremely awkward though—flustered kind of. I realize that part of me had enjoyed unnerving her like that and not because it was some sort of victory . . .

But that's not something that I care to think about just now. Why not? Somehow I have a vague sense that I'm just not ready for this yet. I put the whole thing out of my mind and go back to listening to my music.

* * *

_Author's Note 2:_ Guys, the song the lyrics that were playing as Sam left literally said "I keep running away. Even from the good things." Foreshadowing, much?


End file.
